Nicole Bianchi

Writing, Copywriting, & Marketing Strategies

  • Home
  • About
  • Stories & Essays
  • Blog
  • Courses
  • Contact

8 Tips from The Memoir Project That Will Make You a Powerful Storyteller

Published December 17, 2016 | Last Updated May 21, 2020 By Nicole Bianchi 19 Comments

Cover of the Memoir Project book


Want to connect with other writers? Make sure to get your invitation to my private writing community on Facebook!

Back in September, I traveled to Tennessee to attend the 2016 Tribe Conference, a writing conference run by my friend Jeff Goins.

All of the speakers were amazing and shared so much wisdom on writing. I filled up an entire notebook with everything I learned, but I particularly loved Marion Roach Smith’s talk.

She illustrated all of her writing advice with stories, recounting her experiences writing for The New York Times and NPR and her struggle to pen a memoir about her mother’s battle with Alzheimer’s Disease.

Marion is a powerful storyteller. I lost my own grandmother to Alzheimer’s, and Marion’s words drew me in and resonated with me.

Afterward, even though I previously didn’t have any intention of writing a memoir, I hurried to the book table to meet Marion and buy a copy of her guide to memoir writing, The Memoir Project. She was kind and encouraging and wrote in my book, “Tell your tale and write on.”

I dove into The Memoir Project on the flight home, and since then I’ve kept coming back to it for tips on how to improve my writing.

Don’t let the title fool you. This book isn’t just for memoirists.

Telling compelling stories adds another dimension to our writing. This fascinating Infographic shows how the human brain is hardwired to respond to storytelling differently than other forms of writing.

If you’re writing an article about Alzheimer’s, you could just quote studies and statistics. Or you could go one step further by including the stories of Alzheimer’s sufferers. The second method will impact your reader more than any study or stat could.

Whether you’re a blogger or any other kind of nonfiction writer, you can use the techniques of memoirists to connect with your readers on a deeper level.

In today’s post, I’m sharing eight storytelling tips that I learned from The Memoir Project. I’m also running a holiday giveaway to win a copy of Marion’s book!

8 Storytelling Tips from The Memoir Project

Hand holding up a copy of The Memoir Project in front of river

1. Everyone has a story to tell

You may not think that you have any stories to tell, but that’s not true. Everyone does. Marion suggests using a notebook to help you find and develop story ideas.

You can carry the notebook with you so that you can jot down stories as you observe them in your daily life. Or you can use the notebook to help you remember the stories that happened to you years before. (See my post here about the many famous authors who have kept notebooks).

Here’s a tip I learned from my husband, a fine former reporter and a really great newspaper editor: Get yourself a pack of inexpensive spiral pocket notebooks, and when you are taking in a landscape – whether emotional or physical – turn that notebook sideways, like a sketchbook. I know how crazy this sounds, but you won’t care after you see how effortlessly it signals your subconscious that you’re looking for something different…

Turn it vertically to report the who, what, when, and where of the topic. Go sideways for the why, where you deepen and broaden your view. Your subconscious loves little cues like this.

2. Focus on telling your truth

One of the difficulties of writing about events that happened to you is that you often must rely only on your own memory. Marion gives some tips on how to tell an honest story while preserving your unique perspective.

‘Here’s how I see it’ is a powerful phrase to keep in mind, as is ‘Here’s how it happened to me,’ or ‘Here’s how I felt.’ Make no claim that your version is the only one. If you do not shoot for the whole truth and nothing but the truth, we’re going to get along just fine. Understanding the difference is essential to your success.

…Foremost in memoir, we expect your voice. That’s the slant: your take on the world. It’s what we’re looking for when we buy your book, listen to you on the radio, pay for a magazine that features your essay, or read your blog.

3. Answer the question: What is your story about?

When you’ve chosen a story to tell and are ready to begin writing down the facts as you remember them, it’s important to pause and reflect on this question: What is your story about? The answer to this question will help you determine the focus of your piece. It reminds me of the thesis statements I wrote for my essays in high school and college.

What is your story about? Your answer to this might be something as precise as ‘revenge.’ That’s manageable. I would argue that something as small as a blog post or a personal essay can be reduced to one word…

What I had intended to explain was that right around the fourth paragraph, the writer must tell the reader what the piece is about – what’s at stake, what’s up in the air, what to value if it’s taken away.

5. Make your theme universal and uplifting

When you determine what your story is about, you will be able to hone in on a theme that can elevate your piece from being a story just about you. A universal and uplifting theme will make it relevant to your readers as well.

Never write a story because you want to exact revenge or betray someone…Instead, while writing about the hideous aspects of life, you should attempt to teach us something about the behavior of those involved, about your behavior, about all human behavior. Let us into your story by shedding light on our own dilemmas, fears, happiness, or wide-eyed wonder.

…You have to give readers a reason for this thing to live on in their hearts and minds. Only then can we find your scene lively enough to enjoy, or learn from, or be appalled by.

3. Lead your reader by the hand

Marion also stresses the importance of stepping back from your story and examining it as if you were the reader. Does the story flow logically and chronologically? Is there anything you need to explain in more depth? Any parts of the story that need more context?

I’ve lived these scenes, but you have not, and you won’t see how one idea links to the next unless I show you. Keep in mind that your story is deeply embedded in you and so well known to only you that unless you tell it with great care, we will not understand it, no matter how much it dazzles you.

6. Use every page to drive a single story forward

We live 1,440 minutes in one day, and our lives can change dramatically in a single moment. As we write our personal stories, we need to make sure we are only including the most important moments: the ones that drive our story forward.

Yes, you might have lots of interesting stories to tell, but make sure you only tell one at a time.

The tell-all indicator that a memoir writer is in real trouble is the insistent phrase ‘But that’s how it happened!’ Writers who say this while the piece is getting a hard edit from someone else are sinking fast. How it happened is not what makes it interesting. That it happened at all – why it happened and where you go from there – is interesting.

…So those are the three rules of memoir. They ask you to tell the truth by making every page drive one story forward and have a context the reader can relate to.

7. Save deleted paragraphs for future inspiration

As you edit your piece, you may struggle to cut out the paragraphs that don’t move your story forward. After all, they’re so beautifully written. Not to fear. Just because you cut them doesn’t mean they can’t live again in another story. Save them for inspiration.

And how about those paragraphs that go off in a totally different direction, bringing in an entirely new story? Hack ‘em, though here’s the message of the morgue: What you kill is there for another day, so put those excised sentences or paragraphs in a file where you can retrieve them later.

8. Use your theme as a guide as you write and edit

Never lose sight of the original theme. That’s what gives your story direction and makes it resonate with the reader.

The goal of a good edit is for the piece to read like a sleigh ride: smooth and fast. It can, if not a word is extra, not a phrase is flabby…While editing, check back with that original pitch and see if you’ve done what you promised to do. What did you set out to illustrate? Have you fulfilled your obligations?

If you’re looking to strengthen your storytelling skills, I definitely recommend getting a copy of The Memoir Project. It’s a quick, delightful read with lots of fantastic actionable advice illustrated with Marion’s own personal stories.

And if you feel a little self-conscious about sharing your personal stories, the book is the perfect way to gather motivation and encouragement.

To celebrate the Christmas season, I’m giving away a copy (this book would make a great holiday gift for yourself or for a writer friend). Please note: Marion does address some mature themes in the book. Enter the giveaway here (Giveaway has ended).

Thank you so much to all of you who follow my blog! I appreciate each and every one of you, and I hope you all are having a wonderful holiday season. Let me know in the comments what you think of Marion’s tips, and please share this post with a friend if you found it helpful.

  • Facebook
  • Twitter

Did you enjoy this post? Get the free eBook!

Join the mailing list, and as a special welcome gift, I'll send you a free copy of my eBook "Famous Writers' Productivity Hacks". You will also get my latest posts about how to hone your craft (+ more writing inspiration not shared on the blog) delivered straight to your inbox.

A confirmation email is on its way!

Your data is collected, used, and protected according to the Privacy Policy. Unsubscribe at any time.

Filed Under: book reviews, inspiration, writing

Comments

  1. Byron Conner says

    January 14, 2021 at 5:47 pm

    Hello Marion,
    I hope you are well, and I would like to say thank you for sharing your information. The genuine diary is composed, similar to all writing, trying to discover a self as well as a world.
    I hope you can take the time to read my post as well The Excellent Benefits of Reading Memoirs

    Regards
    Byron

    Reply
  2. Eleanor Gaccetta says

    December 7, 2020 at 8:02 pm

    Love this content Nicole, very well-written!
    Reading books about memoir act as a bridge between experience, imagination, and emotion. It is the most powerful way of influencing how people think and act. It teaches people the most significant values to go on in life.
    You may also read my blog on The Amazing Benefits of Reading Memoirs
    Hope this will also help…

    Reply
  3. Byron Conner says

    November 16, 2020 at 6:56 pm

    This is a useful and excellent share. Will definitely share it with people I know.

    I hope you can take the time to read my post as well The Excellent Benefits of Reading Memoirs

    Reply
  4. JuanC says

    January 15, 2019 at 6:20 pm

    !Excelente aporte! Siempre estamos en proceso de construcción sin importar cuantos pisos tenga el edificio

    Reply
  5. Russell C. says

    May 2, 2018 at 6:03 pm

    Lots of good ideas here. Thanks, Nicole! I especially like the one about saving deleted paragraphs for later. Previously, I’ve wished I saved a number of items I deleted, so I’ve learned that saving everything is the way to go. An important lesson …

    Reply
    • Nicole Bianchi says

      May 10, 2018 at 9:35 pm

      Thank you, Russell. Yes, I save my deleted paragraphs now too.

      Reply
  6. Stephanie Faris says

    January 4, 2017 at 8:35 am

    I love this! I will never write a memoir, but you’re right–everyone can find something in these tips.

    Reply
    • Nicole Bianchi says

      January 6, 2017 at 11:18 am

      Thanks, Stephanie! Glad you found them helpful. 🙂

      Reply
  7. Joleene Moody says

    December 20, 2016 at 10:15 am

    I love Jeff Goins. That sounds like an amazing conference. I’ll have to check it out sometime! And thank you for the beautiful breakdown. Brilliant.

    Reply
    • Nicole Bianchi says

      December 20, 2016 at 10:33 am

      Hi, Joleene! Yes, I definitely recommend the conference. One of the best I’ve been to. Hope the storytelling tips help you. Thanks for your comment!

      Reply
  8. Cheryl says

    December 19, 2016 at 11:46 am

    I often hear from others that I should write down my life story, perhaps this would be the push to make it happen!?

    Reply
    • Nicole Bianchi says

      December 19, 2016 at 1:12 pm

      Yes, you should write it down, Cheryl! 🙂 There are so many people we can teach and inspire by sharing our life experiences.

      Reply
  9. Suzy Quinn says

    December 17, 2016 at 7:50 pm

    These are so helpful! It helps to hear these suggestions more than once and in more than one way. 🙂 I know for myself I sometimes feel lost in the weeds with the stories I want to tell. Remembering the theme and then also the point is to let my voice speak through to readers can be challenging but it is nice to know this is a universal conundrum. Sounds like a fantastic book! I shared this on my Twitter and on my Pinterest. Hope others learn about the book (and read it too!)! Thank you for sharing this!

    Reply
    • Nicole Bianchi says

      December 17, 2016 at 9:12 pm

      Hi, Suzy! Thank you! Yes, sometimes it can be difficult knowing what to leave out of the story. I love this quote from the book, “What Ernest Hemingway taught us in the last century still gives good weight: What you leave out of the story is perhaps more important than what you put in.”

      Thanks for sharing! 🙂

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. IWSG Sept 5: Publishing Path – La Vita says:
    December 19, 2022 at 5:08 pm

    […] recently read an article called, “8 Tips from The Memoir Project That Will Make You a Powerful Storyteller.” For some reason these tips resonated and confirmed my theory: A memoir can be great […]

    Reply
  2. How to Find Your Writing Voice: 5 Methods from Famous Writers - Nicole Bianchi says:
    June 12, 2021 at 1:39 pm

    […] years ago, I wrote this review of Marion Roach’s fantastic writing book The Memoir Project. She illustrates all of her […]

    Reply
  3. 7 Letters from Famous Writers Sharing Fantastic Writing Advice - Nicole Bianchi says:
    February 6, 2021 at 12:38 pm

    […] And I find it fascinating that she started out her career by writing about her personal experiences. It reminds me of this quote from Marion Roach’s book The Memoir Project: […]

    Reply
  4. I'm Moving! (Here's What It's Teaching Me About Writing) - Nicole Bianchi says:
    December 11, 2019 at 12:54 pm

    […] Eliminating this clutter makes our writing tighter and more compelling. As Marion Roach writes in The Memoir Project, […]

    Reply
  5. How to Strengthen Your Writing with One Simple Technique - TrendsEvo says:
    June 5, 2018 at 11:57 pm

    […] finding a cure for Alzheimer’s with stories of Alzheimer’s sufferers and their families is far more powerful than one that only quotes studies and statistics. Those stories will impact your readers more than […]

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Hi, I’m Nicole! I help creatives, business owners, and writers take their writing and copywriting to the next level and grow their online audience. I’m also a published writer of essays and short stories. As a Christian, I seek to follow in the tradition of artists like Johann Sebastian Bach, dedicating all my work Soli Deo gloria.
Find out more about me here.
•••
“My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verses for the king; my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer.”
– Psalm 45:1

___________________

AS SEEN ON:

Support the Blog!

Let’s Connect!

  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • Medium
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Amazon Associates Disclosure

Nicole Bianchi is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Copyright © 2023 Nicole Bianchi Creative LLC · All Rights Reserved · Privacy Policy · Psalm 45:1